"Mortal Frenemies" consists of two shorts:
"Mortal Frenemies" - Qrow Branwen amuses himself at the expense of Winter Schnee over petty squabbles. Meanwhile, Ozpin reminds her that the two are on the same side, so Winter proposes a truce, which does not last long.
In a space of pure whiteness, the giant blocky title and a certain rose emblem drop from the sky to the ground, where the four miniaturized members of Team RWBY pop out from behind it to smile, wave and adopt poses for the audience while an unseen speaker announces the show as: "RWBY CHIBI"!
Taiyang: Zwei, you gotta take your medicine, buddy.
He opens up Zwei's mouth and pops the capsule back in, but Zwei spits it out.
Taiyang: (grunts in frustration) Dog! This stuff is more expensive than anything I take! You chew this up or so help me...
Yang: Dad, you can't just shove the pill in his mouth like a reverse-piñata, there's a method.
Taiyang: You mean using peanut butter?
Zwei gets excited and zooms between the two of them.
Yang: (chuckling) You're so primitive. No, let me demonstrate. (picks up Zwei) Zwei, you are a loved and valued member of this family, we need to take action so that you can live your best life.
Yang places Zwei on top of a nearby table and does a bowing gesture.
Taiyang: Ha! You think that's gonna work on a dog?
Yang: No, it's just supposed to distract him. (takes out a walkie-talkie) Now! Take the shot!!
Ruby: One shot, one pill.
Ruby aims and fires, the capsule travels in slow motion before landing directly into Zwei's mouth.
Yang: Direct hit! I repeat, direct hit!
Ruby: (over walkie-talkie) Did you see that?!
Taiyang: Woah, you girls are so sneaky. I'm impressed!
Yang: Yeah, you should see how we sneak a peek at our birthday presents early every year.
Suddenly, Yang's expression changes when she realized what she just said.
Taiyang: (frowning) You... what?
Yang: Uh oh, uh... (takes out walkie talkie) Secondary target! Take the shot, Ruby! Take the shot!
Taiyang: (livid) I can't believe you girls--
Suddenly, a capsule is shot into Taiyang's mouth, which causes him to choke.
Winter Schnee is seen at a bookstore, she spots a book on the shelf, titled "COLD HEART/HOT LOVE". She tries to grab it, but someone else beats her to it, revealed to be Qrow Branwen. Winter gasps as Qrow inspects the contents of the book. Qrow chuckles.
Winter: (drawing her sabre) Release that book at once! You probably don't even read.
Qrow: Don't worry, you can borrow it afterward. I'll underline all the "good" parts.
Winter growls and tackles Qrow, creating a cloud of smoke as fighting sounds are heard. The book is tossed out of the cloud.
Later on, Winter walks up to a noodle stand being run by the Shopkeep, who is cleaning a bowl.
Winter: I demand noodles of a delicious nature and in a timely manner.
The Shopkeep grunts for a bit before hitting his noodle stand, causing a "CLOSED" sign to drop down.
Winter: This is unacceptable!
On the other side of the noodle stand, Qrow is seen with a bowl in his hand next to a pile of other bowls.
Qrow: It's a shame you didn't get here a little... (pauses as he slurps from his bowl one more time, before dropping it. He slyly winks at Winter.) ...sooner.
Qrow chuckles while Winter growls at him. She tackles him, creating another cloud of dust as punching sounds are heard.
Later, the two of them are sitting across Ozpin in his office.
Winter: I think you'll find my report quite thorough, if disturbing. I spared no grisly detail.
Ozpin: Rampant bookstore chaos and... noodle-related mayhem?
Qrow pulls a noodle out of his ear.
Qrow: It got pretty wild there towards the end.
Winter notices the noodle Qrow pulled out and reels back in disgust.
Qrow: (sarcastically smiling) Oh I'm sorry, did you want some?
Ozpin: Shameful. Just shameful.
Winter: I couldn't agree more! I propose a leash and random electric shocks to modify his behavior.
Ozpin: I'm referring to the time and energy you two waste fighting with each other. You do realize you're on the same side?
Winter: Uh-- I suppose. Technically.
Qrow: Okay, fine. Go team! Can I leave now?
Ozpin: I want you both to shake hands and apologize.
Qrow: I will if she will.
Qrow holds his hands out while Winter reels back in disgust, before relenting.
Winter: Due to my professionalism and... incredible self control, I'm willing to let bygones be bygones.
The two then hold their hands out to shake, but Qrow pulls his hand out at the last second.
Qrow: Too slow, Ice Queen! (laughs)
Winter: That does it! You're DEAD MEAT!
Winter tackles Qrow, again creating a cloud of smoke as fighting sounds are heard. Ozpin watches on disdainfully.
Ozpin: You know, flirting was a lot less destructive in my day.
Qrow: Stop messing with my hair!
Winter: Like you can even tell!
The smoke cloud goes away as Ozpin shakes his head.
- An instrumental version of Qrow's theme,"Bad Luck Charm", is used as a soundtrack during the "Mortal Frenemies" short.
- Qrow stating that he would underline the "good parts" of the book Winter wanted to read is later referenced again in "Teenage Faunus Ninja Catgirl", when Ruby tells Blake Belladonna the same thing about her book.
- Main article: Mortal Frenemies/Image Gallery