Board Thread:Off Topic/@comment-2.96.106.45-20131022215901/@comment-209421-20131121112906

Zol, thanks. It's harsh, and it's harder than I've heard, but you know what? I actually do a lot of what you advised already.

I send each paragraph off to a critically minded friend, who reads over it. My original plot wasn't even going to have the opening as a dream, but after rewriting around three paragraphs, I settled on this.

I'm aware the transition is weird. I'm getting back into writing fanfiction after a year of original work, and that "weird transition" was encouraged by lecturers.

I write the fanfic on Word, then upload. The issue with paragraphing is FF.net altering things on me, I spent an hour yesterday trying to fix things up, but gave up when it just reverted each empty line (to give a distinction between paragraphs) to nothing. I'll try again now, then update each and every page. The punctuation is more speedwriting without having a grammer nazi to send things to.

I read constantly, and was one of the most consistent students in my year level (80%, or high distinction, on almost every single assignment), and I wasn't afraid to experiment with writing. One of my original works was based off an event in my own life, but with the narrator revealing no written dialogue. Check that, if it mentioned music or dialogue, it was on Soundcloud or Youtube, but still technically good enough for the high marks in my structure.

I'm pleased that you took the time to give me a critical response. I literally deleted four hours work last night on that most recent chapter, because I decided "no, this paragraph doesn't work right, and is just clunky." Instead, I took it out, and ended up writing the content I wanted to in a different way for the paragraph I plan to upload tomorrow.

So, thanks for the feedback. I've received so very little, aside for people setting the story to their watchlists.

As a sidenote, which path would you have preferred? Ruby as a killer, where the dream was reality (Sorry about the jarring transition, it was something my teachers caught me on a number of occasions), or the current path, where Jaune lives. Although, the two aren't as separate as you think...

(Trust me, my original stuff is far better)