Board Thread:Off Topic/@comment-26397825-20150901031037/@comment-26397825-20150907015705

First up: Agrus Grau by Phantomlink959

1)       Basic Info: 16/20 points. I would prefer if you made a note of which hand was dominant, as even ambidextrous people still have a slightly more dominant hand. Not sure what the snake motif you have going on with the character is, as you make no mention of snake anywhere, but use it as a key design of a lot of things. You haven’t even listed snakes in his likes, which would at least give a reason for it. Also, tattoos go in physical traits.

2)       Appearance: 14/20 points. His eyes are steel grey, which is basically silver, as in Ruby. Yeah, lost points for that, but reclaimed them by tying it into his name. Also, not sure why you used so much red in his design when Komodo Dragons are primarily black, grey or dust brown. Lean is not a word that can be assigned to Komodo Dragons either, and a Kevlar vest goes against his flexibility as Kevlar is plastic and really not that flexible. Plus, you dropped the ball on his outfit – no shirt, no shoes, no colours described for his combat outfit.

3)       Characteristics: 24/30 points. Not sure why he would get full marks in an exam when he dedicated most of his time to physical practise and you make no mention of him having any theory skills. Even an exam for a Hunter’s Academy would have both theory and practical portions. Also, AU. Would be nice to note that it was AU at the beginning (Which, I know Phantom. You have told me. But I am not using any information you have told me prior to this competition to make it fair on the others, who I know absolutely nothing about. Deal with it). You also don’t mention him being violent and quick tempered as a child, and instead have him just flourishing as a fighter and hanging out with his cousins.

4)       Weapons: 8/10 points. Snake theme again, which I explained further up.

5)       Semblence: 9/10 points. Amplifies…by how much? Oh, dependant on the users adrenaline. Rightyo. Don’t know what it is, but something about the semblance isn’t sitting quite right with me.

6)       Combat Info: 2/5 points. You lost points because other than his personality, which doesn’t mesh well with his backstory, you haven’t mentioned anything that would make him a berserker, and then didn’t give a second class to try to make up for it. Not even barbarian or fighter. And his landing is boring, but it does work. You couldn’t think of anything he could do with his gauntlet claws?

7)       Trivia: 2/5 points. Would have liked a note in his backstory on who he has killed to protect them, other than just ‘worked to take down the World Tree’. Yeah, okay, you can draw parallels, but a little indication of when abouts would be nice. And no mention of his mother or uncle? For shame.



Overall Total: 75/100