Board Thread:Off Topic/@comment-27447621-20160508230102/@comment-25936766-20160513020445

So, I was thinking, of an idea for a character's backstory. Or just plain story. I got ideas for her weapons, and to a smaller extent for her appearance. But the only thing I want right now is external opinion about the story. I'll post about the weapon in the respective weapon thread later.

So, the idea is about ''a girl, based on Robin Hood (may change that later), from Mistral. She was born with Silver Eyes of God, gotten from her father. Both of her parents were Hunters, and they never kept it a secret from her about the Silver Eyes. Since young, they taught her how to be an effective Huntress and how to use her Silver Eyes of God, leading to her growing up to be an Ace Huntress.''

''But there was a problem. She had a brother, (not-identical) twin brother (based on Lupin, may (likely will) change that later), who didn't get the Silver Eyes like her. While she loved her brother (no incest, I got standards), their parents cared more and paid more attention to her, which led to the brother to become jealous. He trained to become a Hunter as well, so their parents would notice him, but without their help and support he was miles behind her in skills and knowledge, without adding the Silver Eyes of God as well. Anything he tried hard to do, she did it almost-effortlessly.''

''Eventually, when they were about 14, on their birthday their parents nearly-entirely forgot about the brother, while showering the sister with attention like usual. The brother had enough, and after a (verbal) fight, he left the house and never returned.''

''Feeling guilty about it, the sister started to hate her Silver Eyes, and dislike attention. She started to hold back in combat and pretend to be more of a noob to not look like an Ace. She started wearing brown contacts in her eyes and more plain clothes. Even her weaponry was changed to one more boring compared to most weapons, and she swore to never use the Silver Eyes. All to avoid attention.''

So, how does it sound? Also, in case someone tries to accuse of Mary Sue: 1) She isn't, she has some MS traits but isn't a real MS. 2) It all depends on the execution regardless. Look at Sherlock Holmes and Lupin. Both are big Gary Stus, and yet both are generally seen as awesome and great.