Board Thread:Speculation House/@comment-67.167.27.143-20130815010410/@comment-11188061-20130919121717

Karthusx21a wrote: Imagining Ozpin and Glynda meeting the Schnees.

Ozpin: You must be Mr. Schnee and Mrs. Schnee.

Mr. Schnee: And who might you be?

Ozpin: Me? I'm the headmas--

Mr. Schnee: The legend of the Schnee dust company has been passed down the Schnee family FOR THREE GENERATIONS!! From your looks, you two are teachers. Where are you from? *Points his cane at Ozpin*

Ozpin: *Pushes cane away*

Glynda: As you already know, we're from Bea--

Mr. Schnee: I know! Let me tell you something good. Do you want to hear about the Schnee Dust Company legend!? *Points cane at Ozpin again*

Ozpin: *Politely pushes cane away again.*

Mr. Schnee: Do you want to hear about MY heroic tale? *Points cane at Ozpin AGAIN*

Ozpin: *Politely pushes cane away for the third time.*

Mr. Schnee: By the way, where are you two from again?

Glynda: *Starts to get annoyed* Like I was trying to say just now, we're from--

Mr. Schnee: From 1 to 12, what's your favorite number?

Ozpin: Well, mine is--

Mr. Schnee: FOOLS! You have no right to choose! The legend of the Schnee Dust Company starts 12 generations ago!

Glynda: *whispers* Didn't you say it's 3 a while ago??

Mr. Schnee: Do you want to hear about my legend!? *Points cane at Ozpin again.*

Ozpin: *Politely pushes cane away again.*

Mr. Schnee: My mornings begin with a cup of coffee. My afternoons begin with afternoon tea. And my evenings...

Glynda: Is it whiskeys?

Mr. Schnee: FOOL! In the evening, I change into my pajamas, of course! Especially one with matching footies!

Glynda: *whispers* There's not even a single link of connection...And those pajamas--

Mr. Schnee: FOOLS! Do you know what this hat is?

Ozpin: *Drinks his coffee*

Glynda: I can tell it's made of silk--

Mr. Schnee: FOOLS! If you don't know, then I'll tell you. The taller a chef's hat is, the greater he is.

Glynda: So, you're saying that you're a--

Mr. Schnee: FOOLS! Whoever said I was a chef!

Glynda: He's starting to get on my nerves...

Mr. Schnee: That's why I can't stand country hicks. Well then, it can't be helped, I'll tell you about my legend!


 * Gives stories that are completely irrelevant to the meeting. Glynda starts to lose her patience while Ozpin just smiles and drink his coffee.*

Mr. Schnee: Then I shall sing the Schnee Dust Company song as a sign of respect to you two who listened to my story.

Glynda: Why would that make you sing?

Mr. Schnee: FOOL! As someone who's unaware of the vital role that singing has played in the cultural history of mankind, you are in no position to deny it! What's more, the fact that you have no right to deny my singing is an important factor that must not be forgotten!

Glynda: Y-Yeah...

Mr. Schnee: Then I shall begin! Honey, I dedicated this song to our beloved daughter! HERE WE GO!


 * Proceeds to sing and dance the Schnee Dust Company theme. Much to Glynda's chargrin, Ruby, Yang, Nora, Jaune, Prof. Port, Team CRDL, most of the staff and even Blake joined in the singing and dancing. Ozpin, as always, drinks his coffee.*

Weiss: *Cuddling herself in one corner while looking purple* That's why I left home...That's why I left home...That's why I left home...That's why I left home...That's why I left home...That's why I left home...That's why I left home...That's why I left home... This. Is. So fucking good that I would personally sponsor Rooster Teeth to see this in an omake. SO. GOOD.