Board Thread:Off Topic/@comment-25396609-20150530162910/@comment-25555436-20150607010711

Alright, I'm back. Now for the final OC: Vedran's Cypress Chronos, whose family name was chosen in order to avoid mentioning your and our anus.

1)Basic Info:

-A member of Mistral's Council....mmm, that's quite the blind shot. We don't even know if Mistral has one. Vale has one, apparently, but we don't know if the other kingdoms do as well. Just like some nations in modern times have kings and others have presidents whose word is absolute and others have presidents that must obey a council.

-"As portrayed in paintings"...cool. Got one so I can verify?

-Symbol: 2 happy masks at the bottom, representing birth and death, and one sad on top, representing life.....Vedran, I know you are detached, apathetic and at times cynical, but this...is just emoish, and wangsty. "I'm happy to be born! I'm happy to die! But life sucks, so I'll cry!". (Total score: 18 pts).

2)Appearance:

-What is it with everyone these days, writting giraffes about as tall as whole doors?

-....Wait, is he Dr. Eggman?

-Got to say, his business suit sounds like a good-looking one.....except for those damn green galoshes. If only they were...brown, or black, then it would look good with his suit. His exploration outfit is fine however, and those green galoshes do fit with it. (Total score: 19 pts).

3) Personality and Background.

-Like friend, like pet, like snail, like Surana, like someone that added like X because he thought it would make it sound cooler.

-And now we assume they have kings....and that he's the son of the last king.

-Discovering the military properties of Dust? Are you saying they were so stupid they didn't know you could use them for combat and even war?

-...Roua? I get it that we both know why calling her Eris was a bad idea, but Roua just sounds.....stupid. With just Rhea was enough.

-Trapped in a shiny prison, couldn't try to escape. Honestly, there was nothing stopping the soldiers from just killing him and leaving with their money. But anyway, he saw there was Dust, Grimm, and people with nothing better to do apparently.

-....You know, this sounds like it cares less about canon and the possibilities and more about giving a good fanfic story.

I like how this was a story about a kid forced to become a self-made man....or rather, not forced, but given the chance to and taking it because there was pretty much nothing better to do. You did take some liberties, some rather big liberties, at some points, such as assuming Mistral had kings and now has a council, of six. A nice story nevertheless. (Background: 18 pts).

-So a businessman whose uprising and background led to him being as greedy as his dad, yet with more of a Dark-Law or Neutral-Law way of doing things. Enforces his rules and laws, anyone that disobeys them is doomed, yet if you don't break them he's not too bad of a boss....I don't know if to like him or hate him, to be honest. (Personality: 12 pts).

4)Combat info....oh, so this guy fights?

a)-Ah yes, the "Soul Seeds"...sigh...let's begin then.

-Crystals and jewelry that absorb the Aura of whoever is the closest. Or so it says, but when you think about it, it's much worse. It absorbs your soul. Reason is that Aura comes from the Soul, or more precisely is granted by the Soul. Vedran sees it like an energy of sorts provided by the Soul but not really related to it other than that. To give an example...

Spartan Armor. The armor, which would be the Soul in this case, provides the user with an Energy Shield, which would the Aura here. As long as you have the Armor, the shields will stay active and regenerate, but if you lose your armor, you lose your Shield because it's the armor what provides you with the shield. On the other hand, if you lose your Shield, you don't necesarily lose the Armor and as such can re-obtain the Shield. But there's a reason I didn't like the idea.

You see, we all know not everyone has Aura unlocked, or even knows about it. As such, we could say anyone not even close to a Hunter doesn't have Aura, just a simple soul. The fact that Aura needs to be unlocked keeps me thinking, that it's just your own Soul providing a shield for you from itself, made of itself. Which means, that by losing Aura, you lose your own Soul, which could explain why one can feel tired when using too much (like Weiss in PLayers and Pieces). Only difference is, that given enough time without receiving damage or being used, it can recover. But if it's constantly being reduced....

At the very least, any normal would be dead sooner or later, which could cause a great feeling of paranoia and ensure loyalty. But against an Aura user, it could be pretty broken. He could just fill his oponent with those seeds and make it lose so much Aura it falls from exhaustion, if not die. The fact it can look like normal Dust crystals doesn't help. Prevented from being ultimately OP by their inefectiveness during battle, but due to it's sheer effects, it's quite powerful.

Oh, and they can explode if they're full by inserting more Aura, which leaves others stunned if not catatonic. Oh, and he can always use those crystals to absorb a bit of Aura (Soul) and replenish his own. Good job Vedran, you made the real Soul Eater.

B)Key of Wealth...boring. Should be Keyblade of Wealth. There, much better.

Just kidding.

-Alright, so a bident walking stick that has a Fire Dust to shoot fireballs, and an Earth Dust to cause small tremors, small fissures, and probably cause some stone spikes to raise. I say small, because let's be honest, if he could made a fissure of decent size everywhere he wanted just by rising his stick and slamming it against the ground, it would be pretty OP against anything terrestrial. Other than that....not much.

Now, the KoW is good enough, If that was his only weapon I would give it a 4. However, as you chose to include the Soul Seeds as his other weapon, I have to include them to. Due to the reason above regarding them, the total for weapon is: 3 pts. Saved by the stick.

-Semblance: Cel Shading. Cool, if I ever want to insert myself and fit into Telltale's The Walking Dead's universe, I'll make sure to call him.

Basically, it makes people incapable of seeing you, hearing you or smelling you. But they can still notice your Aura....which would be nice, if only we knew that's even possible. We know there's technology that can give you an aproximate representation of your current Aura's status, but we haven't seen anything that really shows other people's Auras.

And even if there were, against anyone that doesn't have the means for it, he could just burn them alive, impale them with a spike, or if they have Aura unlocked, give them a Soul Seeded accesory without them noticing and then leaving. And there we have it, the world's best assassin.

Apparently, there's no real constant depletion of Aura while in use, so it can last until the user is KOed or an ally granted the effect is punched in the face. By it's effects alone + a constant depletion, it was fine enough. But by apparently not having a real constant depletion, lasting only until the user is KOed (good luck at doing that against a completely invisible enemy btw)....is a bit too effective in general.

Not to mention what you say later. "Invisible Fireballs/Spikes/Walls/Tremors"? Are you telling me he can, say, launch a burning hadoken at someone and he won't even know it in any way or even see it until it hits him? You know how darn useful and powerful such a thing is? (Semblance: 4 pts).

-Landing Strategy: ...You know, I'm perfecty sure that could make the land actually more difficult to land on, if not more unstable, not to mention the risk of something falling due to the shockwave which could be bad if trying to land safely. Earth tremors make the ground shake, but are not explosions; they don't cause shockwaves that push everything in sight, leaving the center free to land on (if rather damaged). (LS: 2 pts).

-Fighting Style: Leaving the hard work to his minions and playing mostly support fits him for the most part, which is good (for once). (FS: 5 pts).

5)Trivia:

-That kind of relationship makes some sense....still wondering why the fuck they got married though. (+2 pts).

-Roua...Dew....make sure she doesn't live in a mountain.

-Got teachers sent there? And what, his father never wondered why his wife sent teachers there? I'm glad he didn't get his father's dumbness.

-Receiving some training before being sent explains why he didn't die so quickly there. (+1 pt).

Total Score:18+19+18+12+3+4+2+5+2+1= 84.

This one felt like a rollercoaster, I must say. Some parts felt well done and interesting, others felt like they needed more work. In any case Vedran, feel happy to be 2nd place.

And now, the winner is.....JayHart. Congratulations, Jay.