Board Thread:Off Topic/@comment-25936766-20170930010515/@comment-25936766-20171029235520

Now, Cyrania’s Leon Alvarado and Sussana Sullivan

And first thing I’m saying is that you could’ve…improved the format at some point. It gets hard to read at times. The super-bright white doesn’t help.

Seriously, it’s like if you were writing on Pascal.

 --

Part 1: Basic Info:

(Susanna’s meaning)-You could’ve just said that Susanna means “Lily”. Or “Anemone”.

(Leon’s Race)-What kind of Lyrebird? There’s albert’s lyrebird and superb lyrebird. Since you mention “neck ruffle”, I assume the former.

(Leon’s Symbol)-“Neck ruffle and tail feather are an explosion”……what kind of explosion? One of those spiky “explosion” things used in comics? The mushroom-like explosion that shows up when a nuke goes off? Just a big dark cloud?

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes">(Leon’s Nicknames)-So, another one came up with the little “Lyre/Liar” pun.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes">(Susanna’s Nicknames)-….Anna Banana? I understand “Banana”, but Anna-Banana? And Van-man? What?

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes">(Occupations)-So, one is a WF, the other is a Specialist. That’s a more interesting pair than the ones I’ve seen so far (siblings, siblings and childhood friends).

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal">'''<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes">Points: 7 + 9 = 16 / 2 = 8pts. '''

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes"> ---

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes">Part 2: Appearance:

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes">Leon: (Disguises)-…Wait. How the heck can a 25-so years old man pretend to be a KID? He’s not even short-enough, he’s 1.62m. Closest he could get at his age and with that size is an older teenager.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes">(Combat Outfit)-So, his preferred combat outfit…are a simple shirt, trackpants, and a fanny pack. That’s horrendously casual and dull, he sounds just like the randoms in the background in the episodes. Which, given what he does, fits perfectly.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes">(WF Suit)-…How does one add a lion’s mane…to a freaking mask? I would’ve understood if it was the basic uniform with a hood designed to resemble a lion’s mane, but…you say it’s the mask.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes">Susan: …White uniform coat? What do you mean by uniform coat? I googled them up and found a damn lot, ranging from japanese school uniforms to stuff you’d see an admiral wear.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes">Points: 3 + 4 = 7 / 2 = 3.5pts 

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes"> ---

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes">Part 3.1: Backstory:

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes">-I have no idea how the typical middle-class childhood in Atlas is. We’ve only seen a girl who had a shitty childhood with a shitty dad, and the only Atlesian persons that might not be high-class that we’ve seen are Neon and Flynt. And we don’t know shit about them.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes">-To a town on the coast….on the coast of where? Since you just said she basically chased him in and out of Atlas. Is this in Atlas? Mantle? Anima? Where?

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes">-“ <span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1;mso-themeshade: 217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US">before he disappeared back into the crowd to make his ship”…to make his ship? Did you mean “make a run to his ship”?

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1;mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language: EN-US">-….Em…just how damn strong were those explosions? She’s a specialist, she’s a graduated and professional Huntress, and we’ve had Winter and Qrow, among others, show us what those people can do.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes">So, “the room exploded”. Okay. But how strong was it for her to lose an arm and end up massively damaged everywhere else? How strong was it for it to take 10 months for her to recover?

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes">Hell, Dust may actually be too weak in this regard for that. The Queen Lancer didn’t even flinch from having like 8 boxes full of dozens of dozens of Dust vials blown in it’s face. And Weiss didn’t end up too badly from having a Dust Lava Geyser erupt in her face.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes">-Leon’s sister….kind of comes out of nowhere at the end.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes">Points: 15pts 

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes"> -

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes">Part 3.2: Personality:

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes">Leon: “ <span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif";color:#D9D9D9; mso-themecolor:background1;mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US">if there are indeed means that philosophy can be carried too far.”…What? Is that a typo or…what? It doesn’t feel grammatically correct.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US">Points: 9+10 = 19 / 2 = 9,5pts 

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes"> ---

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes">Part 3.3: Misc.Traits, Likes, Dislikes

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes">Leon: -Wait, there are native accents in Remnant?

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes">Susanna: -“ <span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt; font-family:"Times New Roman","serif";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US">will always go out for hot and greasy food whenever she can get away with it”…yet she’s wiry, well built, and has a BMI score of 21.6. Either she nearly-never can go out and eat such things, or she’s got some magical metabolism.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1;mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language: EN-US;mso-no-proof:yes">-“Likes: <span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif";color:#D9D9D9; mso-themecolor:background1;mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US; mso-no-proof:yes">her gun (she’s very attached)”….I see what you did there.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal">'''<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-no-proof:yes">Points: 5 + 3pts = 8/2 = 4pts. '''

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes"> --

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes">Part 4.1: Notable Relationships

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes">In Common: Sam is the only one in this part…and “in common” means that he has a relationship of some sort with both Susanna and Leon. Yet you only talk about his relationship with Susanna, and the most you say regarding Leon is that “he’ll make Leo pay”. Nothing is said about Leon’s opinion of him.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes">Points: 4 + 5 = 9 / 2 = 4.5pts 

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes">

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes">Part 4.2: Rest of Trivia

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes">…Well, “skills”. There’s no fancy trivia notes here. Not that it is obligatory, but still.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes">Points: 5pts 

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes"> -

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes">Part 5. Weapons

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes">Leon: Ciarson.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes">……………Okay. You said “Dust Knife Whip”, and that much I can understand…but I have absolutely no idea of how it transforms into a whip. At first I thought that some rope just extended from the handle to the knife’s blade, but you specifically say “the top of a knife’s blade”. Where the hell goes the rest of the knife?

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes">It’s a simple weapon, so I can understand the lack of big descriptions. But that bit just leaves me confused.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes">Points: 11pts

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes"> ---

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes">Susanna: Nick’s Revenge and Day’s Triumph

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes">(Nick’s Revenge)….Okay, first of all, the name is too silly. Way too silly. Backstory and importance be damned, that name is ridiculous.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes">You say it…turns into a…needle-nose looking-pistol cannon. I tried googling that, and I got tons of different results. I doubt you mean “needle-nose pliers”, so I assume you mean something like “needle-nose adapter for guns”. Those used by some small drills, IIRC.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes">In terms of shape, I can picture such a thing and how it would look, how it would work. But then you say it “turns into a sniper rifle”. And I end up confused.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes">You say it extends into a “standard sniper rifle cannon”, but then I have no idea how it ends up looking. With it’s needle-nose pistol-cannon shape I thought it doubled as a rifle, so all it’d need to be a Sniper Rifle is a scope. But apparently not.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes">(Day’s Triumph) It’s…….it’s literally the same shit as NR. With the same modes and functions. And the same questions.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes">Points: 4pts

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal">'''<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes">Total Points: 11 + 4 = 15 / 2 = 7.5pts. '''

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes"> --

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes">Part 6: Semblances….holy shit this thing is almost unreadable.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes">Leon: The Bomb……..

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes">So…it literally just blows things up. Whatever it is, as long as he touched/held it for a bit, instantly turns into dynamite. Aura Cost aside, this is very, very, very OP, especially with how volatile Dust can be.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes">Even a tiny crystal caused a pretty good explosion when blown up by Roman. And then there’s the explosion caused with a tiny bit of Dust and a simple sneeze. Now, what do you think would happen if you blew something up somewhere, knowing how Dust is basically in nearly every piece of technology and probably even clothes?

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes">Blowing things up with no significant limitations is one thing, but when literally almost everything uses crystals and powder that can cause pretty violent explosions when blown up, such a Semblance goes from good to extremely powerful.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes">Points: 6pts

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes"> --

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes">Susanne: The Light of Day……..okay, seriously, use fucking Enter next time. It’s literally on the same line as the Dust Interaction in Leon’s Semblance’s side. It took me half an hour to even find where it began.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes">…Couldn’t you just Control+C > Control+V the Template post above?

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes">-… <span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:14.0pt;mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif";mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman"; color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1;mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language: EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE;mso-no-proof:yes">” <span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;mso-bidi-font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1;mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language: EN-US">The area around her explodes into a flash of light that affects those around her while not damaging her in any way. ”…Okay, so….it causes an explosion around her? Basically just a cheaper, safer version of what Leon has? Or is it just a flashbang that doesn’t blind her?

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US">You say both “explodes” and “flash of light” so I have no idea of which one it is.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes">-“Range: Short”…Short = “Things you touch”. As in, you need to be doing contact with X do use the Semblance on it. This is Medium.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes">- <span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:14.0pt;mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif";mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman"; color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1;mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language: EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE;mso-no-proof:yes">“ <span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;mso-bidi-font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1;mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language: EN-US">Gravity: Allows for single-directional light-bending ”…yeah, it’s a rule that Gravity can cause light to “bend around it”. Because all bodies with matter cause and are affected by Gravity. And so is energy due to Mass-Energy Equivalency.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US">You know how we fall down to the ground on Earth due to Gravity? You know how things are sucked into a black hole due to Gravity? That’s what happens. Light is attracted and “caught”. Not…”single-directional light-bending”.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US">Doesn’t even need to be a Dust, it’d be much simpler to just add a Tier where she can make a cone of flash instead of strictly an explosion around her.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes">-“ <span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-no-proof:yes">Water: Allows light to stop fully at a point along a misty wall ”………..how?

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-no-proof:yes">Points: 7pts

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-no-proof:yes">Total Points: 6 + 7 = 13 / 2 = 6.5pts 

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes"> -

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes">Part 7: Combat Info: Everything’s fine here.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal">'''<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes">Points: 10pts. '''

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes">

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes">Part 8: Day-To-Day Life: Hobbies

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes">You already mentioned how Susanna likes to play mobile games, and how Leon likes singing, and the rest was already stated or at least could’ve been inferred to an extent. I think the only new thing here is Susanna having weapon maintanance as a hobby, and that’s…too little.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal">'''<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif";mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman"; color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1;mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language: EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE;mso-no-proof:yes">Total Points: 8+3.5+15+9.5+4+4.5+5+7.5+6.5+10 = 73.5pts. '''

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#D9D9D9;mso-themecolor:background1; mso-themeshade:217;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:ES-VE; mso-no-proof:yes">