Board Thread:Off Topic/@comment-35455126-20190702052758

Hi, me again.

So i’m writing a story that takes some heavy inspiration from RWBY. It also takes some inspiration from a game called Honkai Impact 3, (which is similar to RWBY in some aspects) especially with this one idea I had which I need help with.

I’ve thought of two versions of this idea:

1: There exists something called Dark Marks in the world of my story, which are a kind of symbol someone (not every single person, mind you) can be born with, essentially a special birthmark, which is located on the back. Each Dark Mark resembles a symbol depicting something: a crucifix, a crescent moon, a bull’s head, anything. And each one has a different design for each person.

A Dark Mark, in reality, is actually a sort of “seal” for a dark power. When the bearer of a Dark Mark goes through enough emotional distress or is currently going through intense negative emotion, that power will awaken and the Dark Mark will disappear, causing the bearer to turn into a special type of Pandora (basically the Grimm of my universe) into something called an Angel, which possesses quite a few abilities, wing manifestation/flight, nether (a dark energy) manipulation, corrosive blood, regeneration, life-force/soul/ether (the opposite of nether) absorption, some psionic powers along with a special dark power unique to each Angel, along with the ability to summon and command lesser kinds of Pandora at any time. But as a consequence to this, the bearer of a Dark Mark will be corrupted. If an Angel is killed while their power is active, (you can kill one by destroying its soul) a random person, anyone, will eventually be born with the Dark Mark they used to have.

Now the reason i’m not going for this idea is because I think it’s simply too similar to its inspiration: the Herrschers from Honkai Impact 3. They’re these women (though one of them in the story is actually male) with the ability to command the Honkai, (the Grimm of the HI3 universe) and each one has control over something, like an element of nature, space-time or death. Their power comes from a rock called a Herrscher Core, which to my understanding of the lore always ends up lodged in the potential Herrscher’s body, and they somehow or some way unlock that power and become a Herrscher and turn evil.

I like the idea of Herrschers and want to replicate it, but not in the way that comes across as a knockoff of the source material.

The second idea I have are Archons, which are non-corporeal Pandora that have full sentience, the ability to speak and the ability to possess others. People possessed by an Archon gain the same abilities like in the first idea, and always become corrupted by its influence and take orders from it. Each Archon gives its vessel a special power unique to it and has a different name.

So why am I so indecisive on this? Well I want my main protagonist of the story to have a Dark Mark/dormant Archon which she doesn’t know the true nature about/doesn’t even know exists and isn’t controlling her, but the problem is that’s way to similar to the main protag of HI3, who has a Herrscher Core in her body which she is completely unaware about.

Should I just scrap this? Is there anything that needs changing/further explanation? What should I do? 