Thread:The Purpur Man/@comment-26173711-20190822193745/@comment-35455126-20190830055839

The three were working.

...

...

After a while, they managed to make....absolutely zero progress.

“What the fuck is taking so long?” Rax said impatiently.

“I-I don’t know! We can’t make any progress whatsoever! It’s like something’s locking us out, or...” Retro realizes. “Oh, goddammit.”

“Goddammit, indeed!”

A massive hologram of Apophis’ grinning head appeared to everyone. “Long time no see, Targets! Boy, you sure took a beating back on Thoth! Tell me, what was it like losing so many friends in so little time? I personally thought there were way to many, already.”

“Apophis, can you fuck off? Nobody wants you here. OW!” Glitch was smacked on the head from behind by Rax.

“You think he’s gonna leave just because we all want him to? Please, kid. That’s never happening. Just let him talk.”

Glitch glared at Rax, and attempted to forcibly shut off the hologram with an EMP, but it failed.

“HAH! You are powerless!” Apophis mocked.

Glitch finally sighs. “What the fuck do you want, Apophis?”

“Oh, nothing. I have just come to inform you that we and the Righteous Squad would like to play another game! Isn’t that fun!?”

Everyone reacted in uproar, outrage, fury, terror, etc.

Glitch: “NOOOOOOOOOOOO”

“O-oh, god....” Kuyu said.

“WHAT!?” Sir Jake said. “VILLAIN!”

“HELL NO!” Gun said.

“OH, COME ON.” Rax said.

Zephyr sighs. “Here we go again...”

Apophis laughed manically. “Oh, hohohoho! I am excited to see how many Targets shall die this time! This will be thrilling to watch!”

“No, uh-unh, nope.” Rax said, stepping forward. “We aren’t playing this time.” He whirls towards R + M + D. “You three, get back to work.”

“OH, BUT THEY CAN’T!” Apophis cackles. “Because of us, they are unable to repair the time vortex, meaning you, Demeter, can never have your little police box for as long as we see fit.”

“Oh, goddammit!” Retro said, slamming his fists on the consoles and then glaring at Apophis. “Fine. We’ll play. What do we do?”

Apophis’ shit-eating grin widened. “Ohoho, eager to play, are we? Very well. I shall explain everything.”

“The TARDIS is hidden on one of the three planetoids in this system. You are unable to teleport to it, teleport 'it' to 'you', locate it with any and all sorts of technology or supernatural hodgepodge, OR BYPASS ANY OF THESE MEASURES!!!! ISN’T THAT FUN? YOU HAVE TO GO DOWN TO THOSE PLANETS TO LOOK FOR IT!!!” Apophis was laughing maniacally.

“...you know what? Fuck the ship. This isn’t worth it, anymore.” Glitch said.

“Yeah. Did it ever occur to you guys that we don’t have to look for this stupid ship?” Rax said, crossing his arms.

Apophis shakes his head and clicks his tongue. “Oh, Rax. And you think you are sooooo superior.”

“....alright what is it”

“Oh, nothing. It’s just that if you do not retrieve the TARDIS, you will be unable to find the Archons.”

“What!?” Cerise said. “What are you talking about!? We can get to the, easy, right!?”

“No, you cannot. The location of the Archons is directly tied to the TARDIS. Find it, and unlock the keys to find the Archons.”

Glitch: “But that Baja dude-“

“-only picked up fake signatures.” Apophis’ grinning face became more malevolent. “Meaning those were not the true Archons.”

“...wh...how did you...?”

“-Because we are literal gods, Glitch. There is nothing that we cannot circumvent or bypass.”

Glitch sighs.

“...holy shit. We can’t do anything.” Retro said. “We’re gonna have to comply again.”

“No, we do not. We can still not go after the TARDIS.” Rax said. “Hell, for all we know, it could be a trap. The location of the Archons. I don’t think they’d just give it away so easily. It’s a trap, pure and simple.”

“Hmmm....well, Rax, if that is what you think, then it will be up to all of you to decide how to proceed. Well whatever you decide, this shall be entertaining.” And then, Apophis disappeared for good.