Board Thread:Off Topic/@comment-32557376-20170714200302/@comment-14138255-20171002040931

I didn't find the joke too funny, and I haven't read most of the chapters since I'm busy doing other things (namely, writing my own fanfic and working).

Just from glancing, I have to say it looks really hard to follow. There are perspective shifts everywhere and no dividing lines between them, resulting in the text melting in with each other.

Not to mention you keep putting in A/N's everywhere. Rule #3(ish): Do not disrupt the dream. THat's something we're learning in Creative Writing right now and it applies. Only do A/Ns at the end. If you're putting them in the middle, you're taking us out of the story, and that should never  happen in your story and avoided when possible. If it's things you want us to know, putting them in the middle will make us just sneer and say "I don't f***ing care." and that isn't really fair. Put it at the end of the chapter, where the dream is taking a break for a change.

I can't really judge the after-action comedy Omakes since I don't read those even for good authors, but I really think they could hurt the fic.