Thread:LiveandSound/@comment-410526-20151002170147/@comment-24993958-20151016095551

Live…WHY…just…WHY.

I labored on where the hell to post this thing for hours because…I’m not even sure why this bothers me so much. I swore in my posts in the past, I had heated debates that left me having to apologize, I’ve made and laughed at morbid jokes…but this?

In the time it took me to wake up you outright suggested to multiple people to kill themselves, in posts that weren’t remotely humorous…and still have the gall to tell others to stop acting like a kid? I’m not sure what’s the least worst answer for all of this. Maybe you think being here for a while lets you look down on newbies. Maybe you realize the forums don’t have (m)any rules and just run with it. Maybe you’re just a kid that thinks acting like an adult means crossing as many lines as you can because you no longer have to listen to your parents.

I don’t get…no. I do get you, but I don’t get why, and that is what bothers me. My mind is not a very nice place to be, I can tell because variations of your posts do pop up in my thoughts, more often than I’d like to admit. I’ve thought lowly of people, of their education, of their morals, of their worth in life, but even at my worst, I never for one second was tempted to just verbalize them until I thought on those thoughts, I debated and labored on them, in the process realizing how exaggerated, unnecessary and pointless they were in that raw state, and promptly reworded them until they are at worst only one of those things, but never all of them.

…It’s not easy sometimes, seeing people outright encourage your behavior by simply referring to you as a resident troll and trying to somehow justify you outright harassing people as some form of a necessary evil. It’s not easy, because I never needed to do what you do to get my points across…I guess…I’m posting everything in order to sort my emotions, silent they may be,   out  and I realize now that at some point I stopped thinking of you as a person, but as a concept…You are to me, at least on these boards, wrong…not wrong as in, you made a mistake, per say…but wrong as in, you represent to me everything I can do wrong while posting. Being untactful, unpleasant, unhelpful, and worst of all destructive.

I don’t know how to end this post, because I don’t even know how it began. I know you won’t care, I realize this, but I’m going ahead and posting this mostly for me, on the off chance I just stop thinking and post the first thing that pops in my head…When that happens, I hope to God I’ll see this post, because the person that needs to stop posting will not be all the people I’ll be lashing out to, the person that needs to stop posting is me, at least until I get a grip and calm the fuck down.