Board Thread:Off Topic/@comment-25396609-20171116191014/@comment-26397825-20171129132502

Okay, now. The base things like name appearance and even the semblance (as long as the 'in danger' is only when he's consciously in danger, as an autododge is OP because it means he can literally never be hit or lose a fight) are fine.

My biggest problem: ITS A SELF INSERT.

'''Don't. Don't. Don't write a self insert.  '''You can say "But it's just an allusion", but that's the same thing. You've pretty much just inserted a version of yourself into Remnant and then given yourself one of the edgiest backstories out there (team all killed, has PTSD, made a new weapon out of all the weapons of his old teammates that aren't even that different to his original weapon beyond somehow turning into a tower shield and swords, and gave up being a Huntsman to be a Ranger and hunt down Grimm despite that literally being a Huntsman's job description).

Get yourself a proper allusion. Find an actual thing from media or history or mythology or the internet and allude to that. Tone down the Edge in the backstory - not everyone has to die, you know? And becoming a Ranger is superfluous when you consider that hunting down Grimm is literally the specialty of Huntsmen.

Figure out the weapon better. A bow can not contain enough matterial to become a tower shield and retain its flex. Swords are fine, we've seen plenty of bow-swords come through. But not a tower shield.

Other than that, you have a solid base to work on.