Board Thread:Off Topic/@comment-24993958-20150605221100/@comment-26397825-20150606125617

3rdMercenaries wrote: Lots of stuff Okay.

OC's for RWBY must follow the Colour Name Rule. Taranis doesn't really tie in for this, but Basalt at least makes me think of the blackish-blue colour of roads.

Ruby was fifteen when RWBY Volume one came out (it is mentioned in volume two that she is only two years younger than the rest of her team, and generally you must be seventeen to enter Beacon).

There is actually a half-faunus character in RWBY. We have seen them. We just don't actually know who it is yet, because they haven't told us. That being said, I don't think they'd have two 'seperate' faunus traits like Taranis has - one ear and tooth, just one or the other.

The heterochromia is slightly understandable, but is it actually necessary? Like, does he have the faunus-vision (night vision) in only the gold eye, or does he have it in both like normal faunus or just plain not have it at all. If it's either of the last two, it's not really something you should include. And if his outfits covers his faunus eye, it means he can't use it in combat which is really silly. Far better instead to give him a visor-scope, which loads different information on both sides.

His background and personality are perhaps the definition of Gary Stu Emo Wolf Boy. Not a good combination in any way. You should also probably not actually ship your OC with a main character, as that is a high indicator of Gary Stu (which almost always leads to a pretty terrible story. Sometimes it can be done right though).

TL;DR His name needs work. He needs only one faunus trait and to say whether his faunus-eye has faunus-vision to actually be a good reason for heterochromia. His combat outfit is impractical. His backstory is full of cliches. He's a Gary Stu at the moment.