Thread:MalaCassida/@comment-24573226-20160928121044

Your edits show initiative and that you're invested in improvement, and that's very welcome. I just wanted to give a quick tip since I noticed a pattern. Try to create a second sentence rather than inserting more clauses. The information should be easy to read. A good rule of thumb is that if you don't remember the beginning of a sentence by the time you reach the end of it, it runs too long.

Thanks, and keep at it! ^.^ 