User blog comment:Warmachine375/Will there be character deaths in RWBY?/@comment-25405817-20150524173948

I'm sorry about this, but this is something that needs to be done. See this as constructive criticism. It'll help you in the future.

Welcome to a segment I like to call "Everything Wrong With this Blog Post":
 * "Hey guys, Warmachine here and in my blog is about "Will there be character deaths in RWBY?""
 * Roll Credits.
 * Also, the title of this blog is just above this line, yet the user had the need to re-state it inside quotations on the first freaking line. What, he thought we'd forget?
 * Also, bad synthax ("...in my blog is about...")
 * "(just finished in a 2 and a half days in Youtube at Rooster Teeth."
 * This guy made a clarification inside a parenthesis without closing that parenthesis.
 * "There were almost no character deaths aside Tukson but there were mention of characters who were dead off-screen (Summer Rose)."
 * We're going through Grammar Nazi territory here... or Punctuation Nazi... Y'know, let's just call it "Writing Nazi". I'm not happy about being one, but I'm listing every sin on this blog, so f**k it:
 * "death" shouldn't be written with an "s" if the subject it is referring to is not in plural.
 * "aside Tukson" should have "from" in the middle. It just sounds more fluid that way.
 * No commas before "but".
 * "Dead" is not a verb and as such using it after the past tense of the verb "to be" just sounds clumsy. The proper way to write that sentence would be "that were killed off-screen".
 * "I'm also aware that Aura protects all Hunters and Huntresses including the bad guys from harm depending on how long they held out in battle before they expire."
 * OH MY GOD, WHERE'S THE PUNCTUATION?! There're some commas needed to differentiate Huntsmen from the bad guys on that sentence. Not to mention that reading this without pauses would leave an avarage person breathless.
 * Also, Aura doesn't expires... I mean, I guess it would if that person passes away, but in the context of a battle it would simply run out. And no, running out of Aura does not translate to instant death.
 * "Don't get me in the wrong way"
 * (*Sigh*)... "in" is not needed in that sentence. The way
 * "Maybe Akame ga Kill! might have traumatized me for life (pun and sarcasm intended)"
 * IDK what this guy is talking about since not everybody has seen that anime. But sure, let's assume we do.
 * Also, "pun intended"... which completely goes past over my head because I don't see any pun in that sentence.
 * "and my senses are tingling that the Volume 3 of RWBY might go darker and serious with a few deaths after watching Volume 2."
 * "My senses are tingling"
 * "the Volume 3" I don't know why, but I feel that the article "the" isn't needed for "Volume 3". Still counting it as a sin, though.
 * Also, this guy wants RWBY to be "darker and serious" which borderlines with the "darker and edgier" aproach of story telling, and we all know how popular that trend is.

Sin Tally: 16. Sentence: "Traumatized for life"