Board Thread:Off Topic/@comment-26417457-20190922000524/@comment-43897075-20190922220439

The problem is, Hyper, you're only keeping the MOST PROMINANT and oversimplified characteristics of these characters and ignoring literally anything else. - Cinder Hating Ruby and is evil. - Ruby is innocent. - Yang is a brute. - Tyrian is a psycho. - Hazel is a brute. - Emerald dislikes(not even hates) Ruby. - Mercury is an ass. - Jacques is uncaring.

You're not taking in account that Cinder is cold and manipulative. Hazel is calm and quiet(except faced with Ozpin). Yang is straight forward and confident. Emerald is a follower(not a woshiper) of Cinder, but has a mind and personality of her own. Tyrian, while done better than any other character you've tried, has more restraint than portrayed. Mercury is a difficult one, with no real defining characteristics, but is at least levelheaded. Jacques is a business man first and foremost.

Here's a tip next time you write something: Write down every defining characteristic of the person, as many as you can. Then stay within those lines as best as possible. It's not that hard. Before writing dialogue, ask yourself: "Is this something a [kind / evil / smart / manipulative] and [carefree / cold / logical / cautious] person would say?" and go from there. That's the best piece of advice anyone can really give you in this situation.

Think before you type. Plan before you engage.