Board Thread:Off Topic/@comment-25936766-20160701133235/@comment-25936766-20160714181117

Now Vedran the IIth's Ocean Wolfram Lamberto.

-Basic Info: 15/15 I love the chain of color names. Fits CNR in 4 different ways. I do question the use of a swastika as a symbol though (but I'm not german, so I don't mind it's use much). I would've really appreciated if you mentioned the character basis in this section. I know you said you would use the Hanged Man, but you could've mentioned it there, in case you had a change of plans at some point and used, say, Reverse Hanged Man.

-Appearance: 14/15, in Aura Effects, it's how the user's Aura looks when it's being used. Like Yang's, which look like flames. I don't mind an Aura Effect where spiral glyphs start appearing around the user, though from the wording it doesn't seem like that's what you meant. Everything else looks good.

-Backstory: 18/20, I find the use of 1st person instead of 3rd person creative. Though given what you tell in the story, I cannot think of any reason why Ocean would be chosen as the leader of a team, as he showed no real leaderous nor tactical traits, and they were even among the last to reach the cliff. The only way I could see him being chosen is because everyone else was a worse option, but of course I don't have anything to judge them with so I have to simply assume they were.

Also, Kolour....that's the biggest loophole abuse I've ever seen for the CNR.

-Personality: 10/10 Seems good and fits his backstory.

-Like/Dislike: Nothing too impressive. At most the like of cats and dislike of dogs, but that's too minor to flesh out anything.

-Notable Relationships: 5/5

-Notes: I like that you actually went out and planned a team that fit the theme, with every member alluding to an Arcana. Looking at the picture and the theorized symbolism I see now why you used a Swastika as his symbol. +2

-Weapon: 9/10 Let me guess.....Weapon Derivation: Yugioh. The weapon's function of shooting cards reminds me of the duel disk that could shoot cards, though I think that's from GX. Regarding the symbols used to discern the Dust type, the last 3 confuse me somewhat. Everything from the snowflake to the feather makes sense, but a musical note? What Dust element does it mean? The last 2, involving arrows, I assume use Gravity since the design implies Attraction/Repulsion. But that leaves Steam, which I have no way of seeing how a musical note could represent Steam.

-Semblance: 6/10 Personally, it's less fitting of Hanged Man and more fitting of Wheel of Fortune. The "reflection of personality" doesn't fit the effect too much either except in the "roll with it" part. Not to mention, the "personality" you add of Ocean there, wasn't mentioned or reflected in neither his backstory or personality. He overall felt less of a guy who accepts it when things are out of his control, and more of a guy who just doesn't care much and lacks the curiosity to inquire about things.

You mention how the Hanged Man can symbolize "life in limbo" and "circumspection", both of which the effect doesn't reflect either.

-Combat Info: 10/10 Fits his weapon and Semblance.

-Civilian Extension: Expanded Relationships: Not quite sure what you said there should go in that section, but I'll let it slide. It does flesh him out anyway. +1

Overall Points: 90